He-He-Whoooo. He-He-Whoooo.

I have given birth to three children and one of the things I remember most of the actual birthing part is how much it hurt and how much I wanted to quit. Also the miracle of new life, of course! Who could forget that? For instance, my solution to the pain of Judah's delivery was to crab-walk off the back of the labor bed while Shawn and a stout nurse had to help me commit to finishing the job at hand.  I can see that it seems irrational now, but in the moment, I was a genius! And now I find myself in a similar situation. The pain is less physical, but my solutions are just as genius. This is the part of our journey to Mozambique that feels like "transition" in delivery. We are at the no-turning back point; tickets are purchased, good-byes are being said, and someone is setting up bunk beds for us in Pemba. This baby is happening! But all of the last-minute details are piling up and they have become quite the pile and I just found out we won't have a place to cook food when we get there and travel health insurance is not quite the bargain price it used to be and we're told a 6 month visa is a loooooong shot. I'm sure everything would be so much better if I just crawled out of here backwards. Or could get an epidural. But, I know it's time to take a deep breath and bear down. Soon enough all of our clothes will be packed (the latest in missionary wear), all auto-payments will be scheduled, and we get to see what we are made of. It has already been quite a ride and we're just getting to the wild part. Plus, I have learned my own lesson: Giving birth is really hard, but I was rewarded with the 3 most wonderful kids ever. Getting to Mozambique will be just as worth it. And messy.

Must Do List

I have lists laying all over the place. Packing lists, Costco lists, Target lists, To-Do lists.  I noticed an addition to this one while I was taking the pen away from Asher who was making his own addition. I was able to check it off immediately.

Then I turned it over. That boy is thorough.

BTW

So here's what we'll be doing in Pemba for the next two years:

One of our jobs will be to manage and develop the child sponsorship program which serves children in need to provide them with the means to go to school and help support their families. There are about 1,500 children who need to be interviewed as the first step toward sponsorship, nearly 1,000 who need help with writing letters or drawing pictures to send to their sponsors, and more database management than can be blogged about. This will be my main focus while we're there.

Shawn's big project will be overseeing the construction of 400 bush churches in villages across Mozambique. From what I understand, a wealthy guy in Virginia left his fortune to a church with the intent of building churches in Mozambique. That church has partnered with IRIS Ministries and Shawn is tasked with making sure the project is on track. He is the right man for the job, just sayin'.

We will still be doing IRIS Relief work, too. We're writing and tweaking the training manual, we'll be doing some of the training during the Harvest Schools, ever more admin, and we're hoping to develop  disaster preparedness plans for the base.

And, as ever, if you want to send a little sugar our way, you can send tax-deductible donations to:

Zion Christian Fellowship

10405 Old Sawmill Rd

Powell, OH 43065 (please put Mozambique in the memo line)

If you are a Nigerian prince who needs to deposit money directly into our account, I totally get that. Just  email me and I'll get you our information ASAP.

Thrive!

For some reason I can't turn off the closed captioning on my Jillian Michael's Extreme Shed & Shred DVD and I had to pause it (not because I was too fatigued to continue, but because a child needed my immediate attention) in the middle of Jillian's cool-down motivational speech. The words paused on the bottom of the screen that I could barely make out due to the sweat dripping in my eyes were: You lived through it.

That got me to thinking about my mindset for our 1st Mozambique experience versus how I'm preparing this time. Last year, I kept telling myself, "You can do anything for 10 weeks." Harvest School was an incredible experience, but one I had psyched myself up to get through, to endure, to survive. From the beginning I had my eyes on the prize: finishing well. Mostly finishing, but if I could do it well - then I would be bi-winning. For a trivial example, we brought food with us - oatmeal, Jolly Ranchers, life-saving Starbucks Via, etc and we rationed those things trying to make them last the whole time. Hanging on to things like that perpetuated the feeling that we needed them to feel normal and happy. There's no way pack enough comfort food for 6 months (we'll be there for 2 years, but have to leave at least every 6 months to renew or visas/stock back up on trash bags and malaria medicine...) so that pressure is a non-issue this time around. But don't kid yourself, I'm bringing Via again; when I said "life-saving" I wasn't messing around.

This time around is a whole different ball game. First of all, the terror of the unknown has been taken care of and I have a better idea of what to expect. My pep talk this time is, "You're not there to live through it, you're there to LIVE!" We are going to call Pemba home for a while and that's where we are going to thrive not just survive. This is where Judah is going to learn to speak Portuguese, Luciana will learn to read, and Asher will be potty trained (Thanks, Moz.). There's a good chance Shawn will get to be a better pilot and I will see children go from being hopeless to having opportunities and choices.

So, we press on living our lives by faith. This promises to be our biggest adventure to date and I have kissed the word normal goodbye.

Happy New Year!

I love this time of year.  I get a kick out of reading all of the "Most Tweeted Moments of 2011" and "Top Plays of 2011" and "16 Fashion Must-Haves of 2011" lists that fill every website, newspaper, and magazine.  It's nice to see what I missed all year.  Haha. But, truly, I love that this is the time of year to reflect on what was and embrace the clarity of hindsight in order to position yourself for what can be.  For me, this is a season of hope and possibility and I get excited just thinking of what the New Year might hold.

But first, a few reflections on what went down in 2011...
We started the year off with a bang, well... more of a crash.  Shawn spent the first three months of the year brokeback and I got very good at tying his shoes. Since Shawn had so much time laying (lying?  I never get this one right.) around there was time to fill out applications to spend the summer in Mozambique.  Just as Shawn was cleared to work, we were accepted to Harvest School and had a couple months to make as much money as possible (we were already 3 months behind in income), pack up our house, and do all the things it takes to get to Mozambique and back.  It was during that time I learned that I never have to question if God has enough grace for me.  It. Is. Sufficient.

Our time at Harvest School was, without a doubt, The Epic Experience of 2011. I will be reflecting on that for the rest of my life, so I can save those musings for later.

Since our return, I am reassured that God's grace won't run out on me.  Life has taken turns I did not expect - or didn't take the turns I was expecting is more like it. But that is what makes my hope for the future even more acute. I know that I rest in the palm of His hand and I can trust in His loving kindness.

We did have a close second in the Epic Experience race this year. Honorable mention goes out to the most Incredible Vacation Ever.  We spent five unbelievable days in Playa Mujeres, Mexico with our best friends and were able to RELAX. I left cold Minnesota feeling like a wrung out sponge that had been burning at both ends.  I came back feeling completely refreshed and revived and a little sore from all the dancing. Thank you, Jesus! I started my 2012 vacation fund immediately.

I have such hope and anticipation that the good work God started in me will continue to unfold in the New Year. More of my destiny will be revealed and I will walk with more confidence. This hope has given me a second wind to keep pressing in and fighting for what I want out of life.

I'm really excited about our new role with IRIS Relief. Shawn took his first trip with IR in December on a two-week response into the flooded areas around Bangkok, Thailand. And while Shawn was shoveling mud out of houses and dressing up as an elf to raise money for an orphanage, I was Stateside helping to build teams for future relief trips. Check out irisrelief.org to see more of what we're up to.

I have a new appreciation for the unknown and for me, 2012 is all about embracing that adventure. I know that I have put my trust in a very safe place so regardless of the outcome I can rest secure. Plus, I'm going to back to Mexico for vacation.

Bring it on, New Year.

Deja Vu All Over Again

So, after a few months of being back from Mozambique, a month of road-tripping, and another month of Shawn working in Minneapolis and me & the kids living large in Duluth, we are now back in our sweet little house in Linden Hills. The wonderful people who own this house graciously let us move back in for two months - they will be back for Christmas and then they're having the kitchen and bathroom remodeled. Living separately or moving in somewhere for two months? Hmmmm. It was an offer we couldn't refuse.

It has been a bit surreal being back because it's like nothing has changed. When we first walked in the house, Luciana ran upstairs yelling, "My bedroom! My bedroom!" And when Judah saw one of our neighbors walking to her house he did a slow motion movie run into her arms.  That alone makes the hassle of packing...unpacking...and packing again totally worth it. 

We won't be here for long, but it feels good to be home for now.

Take the Whine Out of Your Voice and Try Again, Please

I said to myself, "Relax and rest. God has showered you with blessings.  Soul, you've been rescued from death; Eye, you've been rescued from tears; And you, Foot, were kept from stumbling." I'm striding in the presence of God, alive in the land of the living. (a little bit of Psalm 116 from the Message version)

How can you argue with that? God is above circumstances. His goodness, faithfulness, and everlasting love never change. He is awesome whether or not I'm feeling it. Sometimes [read: more often than I'd like to admit] I need to pep talk myself out of a pity party. It is way too easy to let my focus slip from the Maker of Heaven and Earth on to me and what I want and when I want it and why haven't I gotten what I want yet? You get the idea. I frequently say to the kids when they are whining about something, "Is that working for you?" and I hear Holy Spirit calmly asking me the same question. Oh, to really be striding in the presence of God! Doesn't that sound amazing? To be at rest in Him, confident and secure in His love and provision. I could get used to that.  


I think I'll start telling God how great He is and about how much He loves us and about all the amazing miraculous stuff he does [cue: Delirious' I Could Sing of Your Love Forever] and then I'll never get to the whining.